Forgive the late entry, it’s taken a while to be able to write this one
7 week scan showed babies. Definitely two, possibly a third. They couldn’t agree on whether it was indeed a third baby (and heartbeat) or just a mirror image of one of the other two. I had to drive to an office an hour away for a second and third opinion with two higher consultants, who still couldn’t say for sure. I just have to wait.
9 week scan showed 2 babies. I’d had a bleed the week before, and they think maybe that was the 3rd baby but they can’t be sure. But as of 9 weeks there are definitely two babies growing perfectly on track.
It’s been a shock to say the least. For the two weeks between the scans I didn’t function, at all. I just cried on the couch all day long. Twins changes everything, but also leaves a lot of uncertainty. I was planning for one baby to complete my family. One more would be fine, hopefully a birth just like my son’s where I was in and out in a day, where I could work up to 35-36 weeks again and not lose much income, where I already had everything I needed (car seat, pram, crib, cot etc) Suddenly, I have two on the way, and I need to stop work before my first day of work this summer (ah the joys of seasonal and self employed work) I have to change my car because I can’t fit 3 seats in mine, and definitely not my dog too. I need to buy another car seat, another crib, another cot…luckily the pram can be used as a double
I’m incredibly scared at two babies, and I wonder how on earth I’ll cope emotionally, financially, physically. Some way I’ll have to but right now it’s all I can do to get dressed each day and make it a few hours without crying.
I’ve graduated from the IVF clinic, and without a shadow of a doubt I can say I will never return – if this pregnancy doesn’t work out there is no more babies. I’m DONE. So that’s nice. My next scan will be my 3 month scan via the NHS.
One step at a time. One scary step at a time.